Do You Have To Count All The Calories When You End Up Wearing Your Food?

(Reposted from The Diet Diaries Blog)

So here’s the question for today – do you really have to count all of the calories if half of what you’re eating ends up on your shirt?

I mean, I had intentions of eating everything when I logged the calories into my app:

  • gluten free turkey lunchmeat? check.
  • 1 tsp. homemade bell pepper sauce? check.
  • lettuce? check.
  • 2 slices gluten free bread? not so fast.

Not only were those suckers expensive both in calories and dollars, but this particular brand was so crumbly and dry that with every bite, more of the sandwich fell on me than ended up in me. And let me tell you, that’s really awesome when you’re at an all-day event where you’re wandering around a large cafeteria chatting with the rest of the group. In fact, I don’t think I’d worn this much food on my shirt since the days of diaper changing and burping babies.

Do you know how hard it is to look like you finally have your act together when you hug someone you haven’t seen in ages only to have a pile of crumbs falls from your chest onto their pants? Well, you may not be able to tell me, but after yesterday, I can tell you all about it first hand.

I’ve decided that the next time I go to a take-your-own-lunch event, I’m skipping the sandwich altogether. And I’m petitioning the makers of my food tracking app to add a crumbly feature that removes a tiered portion of calories based on the ranking provided: moist, day-old, sawdust, the dog wouldn’t eat the crumbs, and gluten-free.

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