Andre Moore: How an Injured Veteran is Using Kickstarter to Fuel a Dream

It’s not often you get the chance to help someone make their dream happen – and make sure it’s possible for New Mexico to get some of the best ribs ever made. But with the launch today of Andre’s Ribs Kickstarter, you can help a disabled vet fulfill his passion. If you’d like to know more about Andre, his bio is below this video. But even if you can only donate $5, it all helps. And if you can share this with your friends, please do. Let’s support this injured military veteran and make Andre’s Ribs a reality. Let’s help Andre and Watch New Mexico Rise

View Andre’s Ribs Kickstarter

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Andre Moore knows a lot about picking up the pieces of shattered dreams and putting them back together to find a new purpose in life. A disabled Army medic, Moore is a former high school football player who grew up in a two-bedroom house in Deastville, Alabama, with his grandmother, mother, and as one of the oldest of seven siblings. As the oldest brother, Moore learned early on how to cook for his family and discovered a love for baking after learning the secrets of southern baking under the guidance of his grandmother and mother. “One year when my mom was sick, she couldn’t make the red velvet cakes she made every year for her co-workers. So I made them for her. When they all raved and said they were the best cakes she’d ever made, she told them it was me that had made them. I made them every year after that.”

“It wasn’t long after that that I learned I was good at cooking meat,” he recalls. “I was in high school and needed another elective, so I took Home Economics. There was this beef cook off, and I came in second place with this roast beef recipe I got out of a Betty Crocker cookbook.”

For a child who grew up where food was scarce, creating dishes that bring pleasure to his friends is about more than the joy of good-tasting food. “If you eat with people, you got time with somebody that’s more wholehearted than just meeting someone. To give someone food that is quality, that other people can enjoy, too – that’s important.”

It doesn’t take long into a conversation with Moore to realize that behind his slow smile and quiet demeanor lies an inquisitive, intelligent mind, but it wasn’t his intelligence that he thought would be his ticket out of the low income community where he grew up.

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The Trait That Ruins Entrepreneurs

file4911265967621I don’t believe there is one single trait that, absent all others, can deliver success for entrepreneurs. It’s really a unique blend of traits and talents within each individual – as well as many outside factors – all converging at the right time in the right way. If it were as simple as a specific trait, then those individuals possessing that trait would be successful every time – and that is certainly not the case. Many a successful entrepreneur has gone on to live through colossal failures. And while there are just as many reasons for a startup’s failure as for its success, I do believe that there is one trait that, if given room to grow, will ruin an entrepreneur. When an entrepreneur stops being willing to be coached, their days are numbered – and understanding the underlying root of this resistance is vital, because the solution often depends on what is causing us to shut out the advice of others.

There was a phase early in my own journey as the founder of a startup that I was far too resistant to the feedback and ideas of those around me, and for me, it was my inexperience that was getting in my way. I had clarity on our ‘big idea’ and knew it was my job to protect our focus so that we, as a company, didn’t end up chasing every shiny thing and every dollar that looked like a possibility. But in my very worthy goal to protect my team from being pulled to and fro by contrary paths and indecision, I become implacable. Thankfully, I had the good fortune to survive those growing pains without losing momentum, and I’m grateful that the experience helped me become much more willing to hear the cautionary words of others and to entertain opposing views. I’ve learned that while it’s right to protect the goals and vision of a company, a founder must also be open to advice and correction from others and synthesize that feedback into a more refined path forward.

Entrepreneurs can also become uncoachable simply because we are so afraid of taking the step we’re being prodded to take. We can easily confuse fear with intuition and believe that our inaction is actually being wise. Intuition tells us the truth when we are missing warning signs that something is not right, but fear is a liar and operates from our weaker selves. As entrepreneurs, fear is often the thing we experience right before a breakthrough. When we start rejecting advice that is pushing us past our comfort zone, we become paralyzed by inaction and ruin our chances for success.

But when being uncoachable is driven by hubris, that is really the most destructive reason of all. Hubris is defined as excessive pride or self confidence. Hubris turns almost any trait’s value into a detriment. It changes confidence into cockiness, single-mindedness into disdain. When that happens, the very traits that initially resulted in early progress become the very traits that lead to failure. It is the difference between someone forging ahead into the unknown and choosing the road less traveled and the individual who drives over a cliff, despite the multitude of warnings and cautions along the way.

While an entrepreneur absolutely must possess thick skin and the ability to filter through doubts, fears and bad advice, there better be an understanding that in the midst of the cacophony of feedback, there may be invaluable insights and guidance that could make the difference between failure and success. When we are coachable and receptive, we increase our chances of success.

Perhaps a good test is this: if you think everyone around you is an idiot, and everyone who shares advice with you is a fool who just doesn’t get it – especially if your own vision isn’t leading to your expected outcomes – then maybe it’s time to serve yourself a slice of humble pie and realize that they may not be as much of an idiot as you thought. You may well be in that same category yourself for summarily rejecting all feedback as beneath you. You have to want success more than you want to be right, and when that is your goal, you’ll find the humility and grace to accept difficult advice and hard truths that can help you succeed. I know from experience that hearing difficult advice that goes against what we want to be believe is painful and difficult, but I’ve also seen the results of it and know that without finding a way to be coachable, there is no way to get where we want to be.

Why a Childhood Scolding Turned Out to be Such Good Advice

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I was recently asked to contribute the essay below as part of a series for HuffPost Icon Next, entitled ‘The Best Piece of Advice I’ve Ever Received For Achieving My Career Goals.’ You can read the essay here.

Wouldn’t it be nice when something significant was about to be said, if a bright sign would appear alerting us to this fact? As close as I’ve ever come to this actually happening was in college. In the middle of a mind-numbingly boring lecture, my professor would change the cadence and volume of his voice and announce, “Now write this down. It will be on the exam.” I would scribble whatever came out of his mouth next and then wander back in my mind to some place more exciting than my current surroundings. Thanks to his early-warning system, I managed to pass the class with a B despite retaining very little of the content he shared in class.

When I was recently asked what the most important advice was that I’d ever received, I was hard pressed to come up with a single answer. How does one start with a question like that? Nary a day goes by without some form of advice being shared, so how does one choose that one thing that rises above all the rest as being the most pivotal, valuable words of wisdom?

It’s likely a lot easier to recall the worst advice – especially when there are scars to remind us of our foolhardy decisions. Most of my Worst-of-All-Time Hall-of-Famers begin with phrases like They won’t be mad; you should do it or It won’t hurt. Really. Nothing good ever happened when I opted to believe advice that began with that kind of logic.

And some advice, as inane and obvious as it sounds, pays off every single time. For example, the advice to use my manners – that’s been pretty useful. Seriously. It has resulted in many a positive result and has helped me inspire colleagues to try a proposed course of action which places them far outside their comfort zone. When I was told that please and thank you are magic words, it was good advice. They hold incredible power to change the attitudes, minds, opinions, and decisions of those around us.

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But when I consider what it is that I come back to time and again when I am in the midst of a struggle, whether it is in my personal or professional life, it would have to be the words of my great-grandmother, Zelma Carder. She was a larger-than-life figure of my childhood who walked straight out of a Zane Grey Western novel and into my life. She’d lived this incredibly difficult but exciting life. She homesteaded in the barren, windswept prairies of northern New Mexico in the 1800’s, survived the Dust Bowl years despite losing almost everything she owned except for a grand piano (which now sits in our living room). She traveled in a Conestoga wagon (with her grand piano in tow) to live as a migrant worker, picking cotton alongside her husband and children to survive the desperate years after the Great Depression. She learned to carry the heartbreak of burying several of her family, including her own child, during a flu epidemic in the early 1900’s. She crocheted rugs out of bread bags and turned butter tubs into the most wonderful doll beds filled with satin beds hand stitched from old night gowns and covered with colorful crocheted skirts. She was a true pioneer of sustainability, the ultimate conservationist. The stories she told me were the things of grand novels, and she was, by far, the strongest, bravest, fiercest, most stubborn woman I’ve ever known.

While visiting her when I was maybe six or seven years old, she scolded me for crying after losing a game to her. I had no idea at the time that her words would ring in my ears every time I faced a situation where I felt I was being treated unfairly or had an uphill battle to reach my goal. As I sat in my chair across from her, trying to swallow my tears, she said, “No one in this life is going to feel sorry for you. If you sit there feeling sorry for yourself, you just decided to give up on yourself. And then you’re the loser, not because of anyone else, but because of yourself. If you’re going to play, do it because you love the game. And then when you win, you can celebrate, but even when you lose, you’ll still be the winner because you got to play the game you love.”

Especially now as I serve as CEO of a startup, her words spur me to grow, be courageous and focus on the vision of the future I know is possible. While our team deploys and refines our technology that is impacting the lives of others and has the potential of impacting lives across the globe, I know I’m in this game because I love it. But on the hard days, when everything goes wrong, my great-grandmother’s words remind me that it’s up to me to dig deep, toughen up and find the courage to brush off the disappointment and push forward to the next pinnacle where the view of the future is clearly visible once again.

3 Habits Killing Your Productivity

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As the founder and CEO of a civic tech company, despite the innumerable benefits and positive changes I’ve experienced along the way, I’ve also found it more and more difficult to manage the demands made on my time.

I’m pretty sure I’m not alone – that there this is this moment in the journey of every entrepreneur – when you either make the conscious decision to continue the whirlwind pace of long hours, an intense schedule, poor diet and nonexistent exercise until the consequences hit in the form of total burnout, depression, or health issues – or you have an epiphany that your habits are not sustainable. You realize you’ve been sprinting in what you’ve discovered is a marathon.

I, for one, have hit upon this very epiphany and have no interest in sprinting – sometimes from one distraction to the next – in this marathon of entrepreneurship that I’ve come to love. After spending the last few weeks observing what was eating at my focus and my time, I’ve found three habits which are killing my productivity and sapping my energy.

Email

Maybe this isn’t your experience, but in the attempt to stay on top of things, I became a slave to the little red dot on my email app. But, seriously, think back. Since you created your first email account, has there been a single email which was so urgently in need of a reply that it couldn’t wait until you finished working out, getting groceries, or spending a quiet dinner with your family? It’s so very easy to blur the line between an obligation to be responsive and the tendency to become a slave to the instant demands of others, that our email habits are often to blame for our constant distractions from the tasks which really do require our full attention.

Texting

For me, the days of being excited when I receive a text message are long gone. I dread when I see one pop up on my smart phone – almost as much as I used to dread the incessant poke on my hip accompanied by a litany of “Mom. Mom. Mom.” This slow change in culture has resulted in texting becoming an acceptable mode of communication between almost any connection and even between complete strangers hoping to set up a meeting or connect. I counted one day, and I received 70 text messages in the span of time it took to sit through a banquet. Only two of those qualified as urgent and in need of immediate attention. One was from my son telling me – at 10:30 at night – that he had forgotten his key to the house. The second was from my daughter telling me she could drive all the way across town to let her brother in so that I didn’t have to leave the event. It takes a lot of courage, but consider muting phone numbers on your smart phone that are from people who assume your are instantly accessible but who should really be sending you an email instead. Think of it this way: you actually have a responsibility to protect the integrity of your focus during working hours, even if it means being less instantly accessible to connections who want that kind of access. You’re never going to find time to focus – or to mentally rest – if you are constantly responding to texts coming in on your phone.

Coffee

When I was first launching my business, I believed every coffee, luncheon, or meeting just might be that next big break, so I said yes to every invitation to meet. Funny enough, in the midst of all those coffee meetings, I actually ignored the first two phone calls from the person who actually ended up giving our company that big break. Looking back, there were some wonderful relationships which came out of those meetings, but there was also an awful lot of time spent in chit chat that did neither parties any good – not me and not the person I’d agreed to meet. I had nothing of value to offer them, and they were not the right connections for what I needed to grow my company. Don’t be afraid to say no. It doesn’t make you antisocial, a snob or too special or  anything else you might fear. It means you value that person’s time whether they see it that way or not. I do still say yes from time to time, but it is only when the reason to meet and the expected value for both of us is apparent.

In our attempt to be better at our jobs, to be more accessible and more open to new opportunities which could be your next big break, you may actually be engaging in habits that are hindering you. It’s worth considering – and worth making changes to your habits if you want to cross the finish long in whatever marathon you’ve chosen to pursue.

Four Things That Are Not Failure But Feel Like It

photo by Rachel Abeyta

photo by Rachel Abeyta

Fail early.
Fail often.
Fail fast.
Fail faster.
Fail better.
Fail forward.
Fail towards success.

Here’s a thought. How about we just stop with all of the marshmallow mantras about how failure is good? Failure is not some ethereal goal, and it’s irresponsible to try to sell it as such. Failure means we got something wrong – sometimes a lot of things wrong. It means we lost, and if we’re talking startups and entrepreneurship, when founders fail, so does the team, the investors and customers. Failure is lack of success. Look it up.

I understand the motives behind the attempts to rebrand failure as a positive; the stakes are high. The Kauffman Foundation recently reported “… new firm entry rates are actually falling and young firms are closing at higher rates than before.” We definitely need to find ways to expand the pipeline, and it’s good there are programs and a growing culture promoting entrepreneurship and innovation. But we really shouldn’t be rebranding failure as a good thing as a reason to participate in anything, really.

But perhaps the real fallacy is that we often view certain experiences as failure when, really, they’re not. I see failure as the absence of any option to move forward. Failure is not the moment of initial disappointment, the first sign of rejection or the first time something doesn’t work out. Here are five things to consider:

Rejection is a Detour, Not a Roadblock

While I’d known my husband long before we started dating, when he decided that he wanted a first date with me, he had no idea I’d recently made the decision I didn’t want to date anyone for a while. He and I were both attending a birthday party for a mutual friend. He spent the evening trying to get me to talk to him, and I spent the evening trying to avoid him. He didn’t make it easy. He was charming, funny, witty … and very persistent. When I rebuffed him, he acted like he didn’t notice. When I got up and walked into another room, he followed. When I sat down in the last chair, he found another and set it beside me. He saw rejection as a detour, a challenge, not as a roadblock. Needless to say, he got that first date, and we were married a year later. That was almost 27 years ago, and it would have never happened if he hadn’t viewed rejection as an opportunity to get to yes.

How hard do we try for something we want? If we lack tenacity, we could interpret a setback as failure and quit before we know if we could have been successful.

Not All Opportunities are a Good Match

I well remember the time I was invited to pitch to an organization that seemed like a perfect fit. And while the pitch itself when very well, it came completely off the rails during Q&A when I was forced to spend all the allotted time addressing a clear bias held by one individual on the panel. Even before I walked out, I knew the answer was no. It felt awful.

Sometimes biases, bad attitudes or things outside of our control will make it impossible to win. When that happens, it is imperative to review the experience to learn everything we can about what went wrong. After that, our only job is to put it behind and move on. Don’t look back, don’t waste time on the what-ifs, just move forward. Realize the experience has left us better prepared and more seasoned for the next time.

Disappointment is an Emotion

If I’m completely honest, I’ll have to admit that I almost dread it when I discover I’ve been nominated for something. That may seem odd, especially when it means that someone out there believed I deserved it. But no one I know enjoys that horrible, sinking feeling of sitting in a crowded room as someone else’s name is announced as the winner. It’s not that we begrudge someone else the win, but that losing just feels awful. One thing to remember is that disappointment is an emotion that goes away. Instead, it helps focus on the fact that someone else believed in us and decide to believe a little more in ourselves.

When One Door Closes, Sometimes Better Opportunities Begin

Having doors close is a rite of passage as an entrepreneur. Not allowing it to derail us is what makes us tough enough to run a business and build something from nothing. And, sometimes, what begins as a lost opportunity results in new opportunities. When I applied – and wasn’t selected – for the Women Innovate Mobile (WIM) Accelerator, it felt like defeat. But that rejected application instead created the opportunity for a new connection and eventually led to a wonderful friendship with the founder of that accelerator, J. Kelly Hoey. We can see a door closing as defeat or as an opportunity to expand our network and move forward another way.

Failure always feels bad. And, really, it should. But when we get the courage to put ourselves out there, win or lose, we are better for it. We expand our own tolerance for fear and risk, and that is so important. We also learn that we can survive disappointment and end up more committed to finding a way to move forward. Fear of failure is paralyzing, but the determination to avoid failure is catalyzing. And that’s certainly more empowering than the marshmallow mantra that somehow failure is something we should do more often.

Four Reasons Every Entrepreneur Needs a Mastermind

It was while interviewing Dale Carnegie for a small newspaper that Napoleon Hill landed a writing gig in 1908 that changed not only his own future but created the concept of the mastermind which became a tool for success for generations to come. The reporter was asked by Carnegie to survey over 500 men – and a few women – many of whom were millionaires and were considered among the most successful individuals in the world. The task took Hill twenty years and culminated in a report that filled several volumes of work and outlined the commonalities of experience and process among those he’d surveyed in hopes of creating a path of success for future entrepreneurs to follow.

While Hill is credited with penning the first published concept of the mastermind, the practice of engaging with a tight circle of trusted advisors dates far before his definition to as early as the legendary Knights of the Round Table who advised King Arthur. And, in fact, many of the innovative ideas put into practice as part of the New Deal which many historians believe were responsible for stopping the downward spiral of the U.S. economy in the 1930’s were the result of the mastermind group which advised then-president Franklin D. Roosevelt.

123Over a century has passed since Hill described the role and value of the mastermind, and still today it is a very powerful tool for entrepreneurs. As part of our goal to empower women entrepreneurs and inspire them to think bigger, bolder and better, my cofounder of Hautepreneurs, Jessica Eaves Mathews and I established a mastermind for our group. We meet with a small number of fellow women entrepreneurs once a month, and I have learned first-hand the value of accessing trusted collective knowledge, experience and creative thinking.

Here is why every entrepreneur needs to be a part of a mastermind:

No Complacency Allowed

As the founder of a company, every day is filled with demands and needs coming fast and furious from a multitude of directions, including customers, employees, vendors, investors and beyond. It is easy to allow your time to be consumed with addressing issues as they arise and to not to push ourselves into new areas of growth – the very thing that must happen if we are to stay relevant and capture more of the market. Meeting with a group of peers who all live with the same level of demands means that you will likely get very little pity or license to go easy on yourself. Whether you are afraid to embrace the risk of growth, face the upheaval of firing an entrenched problem employee, or of forcing yourself to slow down to gain proper perspective, a mastermind group will push you beyond complacency and auto-pilot, challenging you to address problems, step up your game and lead with more authority and courage.

Safe to be Vulnerable

There is this scene in the movie You’ve Got Mail where a famous author comes rushing into the book store worried about the possible loss in business due to a new big-box book seller opening nearby that could mean the little store might be closed before her upcoming book signing. The accountant puts on a brave face and declares, “No difference!” despite it being patently untrue. As an entrepreneur, we quickly learn that it is imperative to put on a brave face, wear our courage with a smile, and push forward into the future with all confidence despite living dangerously close to the edge of failure. We often feel isolated and alone, because we can’t let our guard down and talk about the moments when we are terrified that perhaps all we’ve done is build an intricate house of cards that will come tumbling down at any moment. These are the moments of fear and self-doubt that only another entrepreneur can understand. When members of a mastermind are bound by a legal NDA (non-disclosure agreement), there is an incredible freedom that comes with that level of trust. We can talk about the fear, about how close we’re pushing to the edge, about the level of risk we’re living with. And what we discover is that we are far from alone – that every entrepreneur out there is living with more risk, more fear, more worry and less runway than anyone else might be willing for. And sometimes, in the shared experience of learning we are not alone in our fears or in our willingness to take calculated risks, we can begin to accept that our reality and our choices are not so crazy or stupid as they sometimes seem at three in the morning when we haven’t yet figured out how we’re going to meet the lofty goals we’ve set for ourselves and our company.

Access to Variety of Expertise

The best masterminds are organized with a similar level of success and drive but from varied backgrounds and industries. When you seek the advice of others within your industry, you can begin with a higher level shared knowledge that makes it easier for your peers to understand the nuances of your current challenge, but what it won’t get you is the fresh perspective that comes with entrepreneurs who work within a very different industry and approach your challenge from a unique history and experience. When you can tap into the varied experiences, expertise and talents of successful entrepreneurs in different industries, you’d be surprised at the creative approaches that are suggested that often solve your problem in a way you would have never thought of on your own.

Steel Sharpens Steel

For a mastermind group to deliver the most value for all of the members, it is vital that the group be of similar levels of success with similar goals for growth. If the group includes a mix of powerhouse, highly driven leaders and more casual business owners, the friction of values will eventually lead to all of the members feeling that the group is not delivering enough value for the time expended. The leaders will feel frustrated and those who are happy with less pressure will feel disrespected. When the group is created with careful consideration of pairing the level of goals and intensity of drive among the individuals within the group, and when it is kept small enough for each in attendance to have enough time to feel heard and supported, the members will leave with a clarity of focus that only comes from steel sharpening steel.

Being a part of a mastermind where I can bring the unique challenges I have encountered as our team grows APPCityLife into a global platform – and where I can draw from my own experience to shed new light on the challenges of my fellow members are facing – it has helped me understand the real value of making ourselves accountable, vulnerable and available to our peers. With the right kind of mastermind, entrepreneurs gain a level of support and safety that is rare within the startup world.